“The nurses who are euthanising people justify it by saying ‘I just don’t want to see them suffer’.”

An agency nurse who has worked in acute, community and palliative care, reveals some shocking truths about the NHS, its doctors and its current protocols. As follows:

“I’ve been a registered agency nurse for over 25 years and worked with various protocols - some that involve administering end of life drugs. We ease the suffering of terminally ill patients and the patients often die because of that but that doesn’t make us mercenaries. I think the doctors who prescribe and the nurses who administer the meds believe they’re helping the patient. I have never been part of a concerted effort to harm or kill our patients. No matter where I end up.

I do believe, however, that these EOL medications - often referred to as ‘anticipatory’ drugs - are prescribed way too often. Personally, I do not like to give them. I’ve also seen them being misused… a LOT.

I’ve witnessed many unpleasant situations, including ones where family members ask for the drugs to be administered - sometimes when they’re not even needed. Not everyone loves and cares about their relatives.

I’m happy to speak out about what I’ve seen but, unfortunately, I have to remain anonymous. I do not earn much and I have kids to feed and a mortgage to pay.

Like some (but not all) nurses, I do my best. But there are also a good number who are callous and simply follow orders without question. All they ask is “how high a dose shall I give?”

There’s a rumour that nurses were brought from abroad especially to kill vulnerable patients but I find that hard to believe. I was one of those international nurses recruited by the NHS back in 2003. I worked in acute and community hospitals. From 2020, there was a very high demand for agency nurses. That’s because the turnover is so fast - no one wants to stay working for the NHS for long. Management is appalling, money is mismanaged, new buildings are built and there’s no one to staff them and medication is wasted on an industrial scale. No one ever questions why or how meds are wasted. Here’s an example: two months supply given to a patient before they are discharged, patient dies… so where does the thousands of pounds worth of UNUSED medication go? We don’t recycle and they aren’t allowed to reallocate them to someone else. I keep asking about this in different units and some say they’re returned to PHS to be destroyed. I dont know if that’s true. In my opinion, it’s the biggest NHS scam.

I know that some staff steal drugs, the most targeted ones being painkillers and sedatives. When a certain drug is being controlled and need a two-person check, that means previously it’s gone missing in that trust. One unit told me that a nurse was caught taking oral morphine while on shift which meant they had to lock it up in that particular trust. Not all trusts do the same.

In 2020, NHS staff believed there was a deadly virus. I’ll be honest, I was scared at first and always wore a mask. Then the data came and I was shamed by it. So I stopped wearing to a mask and was  constantly reprimanded. Physiotherapists gave up on one woman because they were so afraid of her having a positive PCR test. I would go into her side-room - no gown no mask - and give her a hug. I documented what I could, saying it was wrong that she wasnt having enough therapy. We isolated patients for having a cough, no fever, no threat. Just stupidity. The Cult of Science.

There are so many things wrong within the NHS at the moment and in the health industry as a whole… bad habits, bad nursing, bad doctoring… Only yesterday, at work, I saw a nurse manipulate a patient’s vital signs. This happens frequently. When the vital signs are measured, the nurse makes the patient do deep breathing. But this is not how we normally breathe. So the true value is hidden behind an active exercise that is not really done by the patient naturally. So, for example, if your sats are low - at, say, 90 at rest - then you may have a problem. And staff are trained to get the patient to do deep breaths in that situation, which will improve the value. But, in reality, there may be a problem that will be overlooked because of failures in training. They make the values look how they want to look, masking reality.

This is just one of many issues. But like many issues - big and small, some medics will defend what they do as that’s what they’re taught. I think much of what they’re taught and much of what they currently do in hospitals is very, very wrong.

Malpractice is rife in the NHS. It’s being normalised nowadays. Like insisting on insulin for type 2 diabetics. I think this is the wrong treatment and believe this is malpractice because it I’m not a doctor, so what do I know?

I have worked in places where patients were being given meds that depress respiration and saw them being drugged to death. They used midazolam and morphine, sometimes Remdesevir. I would come on a night shift in a community hospital and would be almost demonised - or at the very least frowned upon - when I questioned the use of these drugs. I would refuse to give them unless the patient was really in pain or severely agitated. I was made to look bad because I didn’t want to help. I remember one time explaining to family members that if we gave these drugs, it could be the end and that I didnt want to be the person who pulled the trigger. After I’d finished my shift, another nurse was asked to do it. The nurses who are overdosing and euthanising people are far or more aggressive and justify what they’re doing by saying "I just don’t want to see them suffer".

Before coming to England, I worked in the Philippines in a private hospital. The attitude there was different. The medics try to extend life as much as possible. But you pay for every needle, bandage and roll of tape.

I’d like to say more but it’s difficult. I dont think my agency will sack me but the amount of drama and politicking around the places I work is crazy. I have been denied work because of rumours quite recently. And, for me, as I’m self-employed no work means no pay.

Right now, I don’t want to nurse any more. The NHS is corrupted. But I don’t have any other options. So I’ll just continue doing what I’m doing - documenting wrongdoings and speaking out when I can.”